January 31, 2006
for the record

It's really, really, really hard to get up in the dark. And Goblin doesn't like it, one bit.

Also, this line has been sitting in my fnet scan for days. It makes me strangely happy:
Group: noe (mvl) Mod: beca Topic: meriko is my power animal

Addendum:
Insult to injury: I realized (just as I pulled onto the freeway far, far too early)that I put down my big fresh cup of love from coffeebot when I picked up my iPods on the way out the door. And didn't pick it up again.

It's going to be a long, long day. And a long, long night.

Posted by shock at 05:44 AM
January 29, 2006
infestation

Annika left her tribble here.
It vibrates.
I fear it.

(I thought it said me-ow?)

Posted by shock at 09:45 PM
January 28, 2006
healing

Put on some old jeans & a comfy old shirt.
Pull back your hair.
Load an iPod with Curve and Damage Manual.
Strap it on.
Go outside.
Notice it's raining lightly.
Stay outside anyway.
Start by pulling the really big weeds.
Cut back the plants that need it.
Search and destroy the smaller weeds.
Pull the weeds and mulch out of the cracks in the concrete.
Cut back the trees encroaching from the neighbors' yards.
Climb the tree.
Obliterate the passionflower.
Pile up the branches that blew down in the storms.
Kill the black widows.
Relocate earthworms to dirt.
Let the other critters be.
Get dirty.
Wear gloves.
Be wary.
Fear nothing.

Posted by shock at 06:26 PM
January 26, 2006
dreams

I woke up this morning to a dream where Heidi was planning a vacation for me - laying out art and food and snacks and cocktails.

She said "You're so stressed, and so tired, and so sad - you just need to escape for a few days."

And I said "I wish I had the energy to plan a weekend getaway."

And she said "I already am, silly girl!" and handed me a piece of paper full of itinerary.

(She also pulled out a cookbook, that was and wasn't allatonce the Boulevard cookbook, and showed me some delicious concoction that was a savory long-stewed red wine meaty something over some kind of savory waffles that she was going to cook for me. I looked at the recipe in the dream, but didn't think to write it down when I woke up, and now it's gone. Heidi, I wish I had written it down so I could make it for you.)

And then the perspective shifted and we were both on the phone and in person and I was to meet her in a half an hour for some live music (I didn't even ask what - Heidi's taste in music is trusted by my conscious and subconscious), and I realized I was wearing seriously mismatching stripes. And not even in the 1987 Esprit sort of way - just bad. And I was looking for a notebook and another shirt, and the dream faded as Goblin jumped on my bladder.

Also: I dream of you, and a better time, and a better place, and a better opportunity. I miss you already.

Adjunct: I hope you're all poking around my flickr feed and flickr contacts this week. I was lucky enough to attend the most fabulous wedding this weekend, and I'm slowly popping photos up. My friends are popping up the most ridiculous pictures of me along with gorgeous pictures of the bride and groom around NYC. Jen & Dietsch, congratulations again and again. It's amazing and magic to get to bask in your mutual glow. You're dreamy.

Posted by shock at 08:00 AM
January 22, 2006
jiggity jig

Home again - purring cat in lap, gyre in the driveway.
My body is really unclear about the time.
Banh mi makes excellent airplane food.
There are bagels for the morning.
Time to sleep, for tomorrow I work.
(And torment you with more photos
& a heidi-esque listview of my weekend.)
Didja miss me?

Posted by shock at 11:58 PM
January 17, 2006
guidance

I love my friends. They are full of the most excellent and helpful suggestions.
Case in point:

'Try to use the phrase "mais que sont ces conneries que vous me faites???" '

Posted by shock at 10:52 PM
cherry blossom girl

The sky was stunning this morning - all 44 miles of it ahead of me.

The sort of stunning that makes me think (philosophically) about beauty
and where it comes from
and why we perceive it the way we do
and how it might be different if my brain was wired up in a different order
and then I round a bend
and I catch my breath
and the skyline changes slightly
and is every liittle bit more beautiful than a mile ago
and yet every mile i feel
a tiny sense of loss for the skyline of the mile before.

Days like today I regret my commute not one whit.

Posted by shock at 10:36 AM
January 13, 2006
enchanted

Enough with the kvetching that's been going on for months. This last week or so has also been full of evidence and reminders that my life remains charmed.....

...like gorgeous random hidden tango in a cafe in the Mission, stumbled over late Sunday night. With a dance or two for us. And an invitation to return. And she understood what passes for my French.

...like a perfect grownup girls dinner at the sashimi bar at Ame with my very best girl. We were stunning, the food was sublime, and the conversation was stellar.

...like flowers from my favorite human at work, just to make me smile.

...like a warm welcome from one of my favorite bartenders in the Mission - who I haven't seen in over six months. (She thinks my braids are cute, too.)

...like late night adventures on the Bernal slides - wet butts, breathless tearing up the stairs for more sliding, kissing in dark, discovering the sound effects as you lay on the bottom of the stairs and taptaptap.

...like the warm anticipation of a visit from a dear friend, and a mini-vacation to celebrate the happiness of other dear friends.

Posted by shock at 08:51 AM
January 07, 2006
wisdom

One finds wisdom and good advice in the most unexpected places. To wit: most excellent relationship advice, from one of my new cookbooks....

"...we don't always share the same opinion, and we do disagree, but our secret is as follows: don't hold grudges, be liberal with apologies (they're free), admit your mistakes, and it's OK to let someone else be right. Let's not understate the importance of mutual respect, but the greatst bond of all is that we appreciate each other's sense of humor and think that we are hysterically funny."

--Nancy Oakes & Pam Mazzola, Boulevard, the Cookbook

Posted by shock at 07:34 PM
January 03, 2006
day one

Thanks, Devorah. Feels really good to be back on the mat.

Posted by shock at 08:21 AM
January 01, 2006
01.01.06

0. So many happy returns to Andi & Brian!
1. I have excellent posture and mighty cleavage.

Over and out.

Posted by shock at 10:07 PM